Baby Gear - What do you need? What can you skip?

Things not to waste your money on:

1. Changing Table:  Unless one is given to you for free as a hand-me-down, you don't need a changing table.  Save space and getting rid of a single-purpose item later, by putting a contoured changing pad atop a dresser....unless you already have a dresser for the baby's room that's the wrong height.  We bought one at Ikea and affixed a contoured pad on top with a bunch of double-sticky velcro. It worked beautifully when he was in diapers and he still uses the dresser.
2. Wipes warmer:  You have built in wipes warmers, they're your hands! It's one more thing to make room for and if the wipes are that cold, you can just hold one in your hand for a few seconds to warm it up. 
3. Bottle washer/sterilizer: Do you have a dishwasher?  Yeah, that's a bottle washer/sterilizer.
4. Shopping Cart covers - I got sucked into this one. Instead just take sterilizing wipes and a blanket. Much cheaper and easier to deal with.  There really is nothing more gross than seeing your baby suck on the handle of a shopping cart but one of the bazillion baby blankets you'll have works perfectly.
5. Things that cost extra because they added a vibrator...i mean, vibrating feature to it. It doesn't do a thing. Babies like dramatic movement not 2.8 earthquakes. 
6. Video monitors.  These may have gotten better. The quality of the video when we had this option was awful. A regular monitor though lets you close the door and get on with life in the house. We always closed ben's door from day one and he still closes the door to sleep now. It's really helpful for lots of reasons...sound, being the biggest one but also we can hear if he comes out of his room because his door cricks when you  open it!
7. Nursing coverups - this could be helpful but although I was really modest about nursing, I could still do it w/out a coverup...they aren't cheap and, like the shopping cart covers, can be replaced with a simple blanket.  For my cousin's wedding I picked up a cheap crocheted sweater poncho thing that worked brilliantly.  I could see Ben through the holes because i was inches away but no one could see through it from a distance.  
8. Same with nursing tops...they totally suck. It's way harder to get your boob out of a nursing top than just a regular shirt, they're all layered and confusing. (Edit: a friend recommended GlamourMom.com, I have no personal experience but I trust her!) 

Things worth the $$:

1. A really good breast pump.  Don't cheap out on this: Pump In Style Advanced Breast Pump Backpack is what I used and loved it.
2. A swaddling blanket. Swaddleme or the Miracle Blanket.  If you have a houdini baby like Ben was, he could get out of any blanket swaddle and then be completely pissed off he was out of the swaddle. Never made sense to me.
3. A good, quick, easy to put on carrier.  A sling works when they're itty bitty.  We just had the Baby Bjorn and called it the mute button.  They have improved on it more now. It's probably good to have a couple of types of carriers because they say the bjorn is bad for their hips or something if they're in it too much.  Ben loved it though.
4. A swing is a godsend for about a month.  Ones that swings frong to back and side to side. It may be the only place baby will sleep for weeks.
5. Diapers. Cloth diaper service was awesome. I know how bad I am at doing laundry without a newborn and without it being full of poo.  Yes, by the end of the week the diaper pail is a bit rank, but you put it on the porch and they disappear and a new clean bag of diapers appears in its place.  It's like magic.  It also means you don't have to go to the store as often to buy the disposables. ... BUT!  We learned and unlearned this through sleep deprivation: put the baby in disposables at night....seriously.  We ran out of cloth...or got him ready for sleep away from home so we put him in a disposable, or something like that...he slept for HOURS.  We put him in a cloth diaper, he'd sleep for 3 hours.  Couldn't figure out why he wasn't sleeping.  Duh....disposables wick away the moisture.  Cloth all day, disposables at night.  I liked Pampers, I found that Luvs and Huggies leaked. But every baby is different and that will be trial and error.
6. Gripe Water. Call it colic, call it a tummy ache, call it the baby just won't stop crying!  You'll try anything. Sometimes this works instantly.
7. The stroller was a really stressful purchase. I had no idea what to look for.  We ended up going through a few. The first one sucked.  Here's what they need to do: TURN!  I don't know why strollers don't turn. Seems obvious. Look for a Quinny Zapp. They were AWESOME for us. The only problem with the one we had is it didn't recline but we didn't get it until ben was 2 so it wasn't that big of a deal.  They should turn and fold up without needing 2 people....and not weigh 50 pounds. Light, maneuverable and easy to fold.  Don't worry about cargo--whatever , you can add a velcro bag.  You want to be able to push and turn it with one hand because there will be times you will be carrying the baby and pushing the stroller.
8. Nursing Bras.  Get ones with a little plastic clip, not a hook, to open and close them. Hooks take two hands. The clips are quick and easy. Cotton and comfy, no underwire. I had a pretty underwire one for special occasions only. And washable, reusable breast pads.  You'll leak. The disposable ones are itchy.

That's my baby advice brain-dump!